Essay #5

From Spies to Fries:
My Thoughts on the 8th Grade Field Trip to Washington DC
  An Essay by Ashlyn Buffum
8th Grade English
Pine Point School


In our Washington DC Trip we did everything. From spies to fries and from memorial to memorial we learned about our country’s history. In my mind this trip was the best one in Pine Point. All the places where we went were my favorite but there were some that were really special.

Seeing the sites at Mt.Vernon

TS: My favorite part of the trip was going to Mt. Vernon and seeing Washington’s house and the things he might have seen when he was alive. SD: The objects that we saw were remarkable, for each one was placed almost in the exact way that Washington left them. CS: We also saw things that people don’t normally see like the basement and the attic. CS: In the basement we saw the winery and also some of the old foundation, which was from the old farm house. SD: However my favorite site we saw at Mt. Vernon was seeing Washington’s tomb. CS: I think that was the closest I have ever come to a man from American History. CS: I was especially  close when they opened the gates and Mia and Christian laid a wreath in the tomb. SD: Not only were the places where we went wonderful, but also the tour was awesome to. CS: The tour guide gave so much information about Washington’s home and his accomplishments that it was overwhelming. SD: Besides the house and the wonderful tour they showed us a   movie they showed us was impressive. CS: The movie showed was about Washington’s successes with special effects. CS: For example, there was smoke machines and our chairs would move with canon fire. SD: Another Favorite of mine during the trip was the Spy Museum. CS: At the Spy museum we cracked codes and solved a case. CS: We also picked nicknames for each other. SD: The exhibits weren’t bad either with the air vent that we could crawl through. CS: Also, James Bond’s car and other objects that spies from movies to real life have used over the years. C: There are so many good events about this trip to DC in every spot we went to.

The Iwo Jima Memorial 

TS: Another thing that made this trip the best was having so much freedom during the day. SD: My friends and I could hang out at where ever we stopped for lunch or dinner. SD: In addition, we could chat when we were walking between memorial from museum and on the bus. SD: We also had a lot of freedom at the 4h center where we could go down to the game room until 10:00 and have lights out at 10:30. CS: Having so much time with my friends on this trip was one of the things that really made this trip the greatest in the years of Pine Point. SD: In addition, the memorials were also really cool. My favorite was my memorial. CS: The Iwo Jima memorial was huge and it looked breathtaking in the hours of darkness. CS: It was also really nice to hear about the memorials from my classmates speeches. C: Everyone one did a great job on their speeches and projects. I loved DC!

In our Washington DC trip we traveled across time to the past. We saw Washington’s house, the Holocuast, and other war memorials. At every monument, museum, and painting history came to life and told its story. This trip was the best and most exciting adventure.

Self assessment

1) My weakest part of the essay is my wording. I need to use more interesting words and not use just simple and regular words.

2) One possible strong point is my Introduction paragraph. The paragraph hooks the reader into the essay and explains what I’m going to talk about without to much detail.

3) I’m continuing to work on my body paragraphs. I need to organize my thoughts better and make sure that everything is clear.